Death By Jello
by shinkan neko85
Summary: In which Naruto, Neji and Kiba, get drunk and prank Sasuke's house. In which Lee is at loss for words. And Kakashi wonders how much a cities worth of Jello costs. A series of one-shots
1. Death By Jello

Ok this is very OOC.. But we could not help it…. It's also AU

* * *

It all started with the drinks. Kiba was celebrating his great accomplishment that Yamanaka Ino had FINALLY decided to go at out with him. But seeing as it had been right before she left on a mission with Shikamaru and Chouji, he hadn't had time to go on an actually date with her, so he decided to have a 'party' over at Naruto's apartment.

As it was the end of the month, and most ninja were trying to get their last minute missions in, only Naruto, Lee, and Neji had the time to celebrate with Kiba.

They were all in their early twenties and Kiba brought sake to share with his fellow ninja. Though because of his odd reaction to sake, and also because they wanted at least one person sober, Lee was not allowed to drink a single drop of alcohol. But this decision was just one of the many mistakes they had made, for there were many more, and the next mistake was letting Neji drink until he was drunk, even though Hinata had recently warned them that not only was Neji a lightweight, but he was a very happy drunk. Not to mention mischievous, very prone to ridiculous behavior, and of course, destructive marauding.

The very first sign of this was when he requested Lee to go out and get highly ridiculous amounts of toilet paper and all the jello he could get.

"Lee, go get jello. -Hic-" Neji grinned, flapping a hand at him, giggling like a school girl.

Naruto scratched his head, less drunk, and muttered, and no one understood him," What do you want jello for?"

Kiba smacked Naruto hard on the back encouragingly, "C'mon man, SPEAK UP!" He then preceded to hiccup and fall out his chair. Lee, frowned at Neji, as he sipped his tea.

"Uh… Neji, why do you want jello? It's almost eleven-thirty."

Neji ginned impishly, and then said after another gulp of sake, "And don't forget toilet paper." Lee looked thoroughly confused at this point and was about to dismiss the whole suggestion when Kiba barked at him with a laugh, "C'mon man, where's your spirit of youth!?"

Naruto, now more drunk then Neji, called in, "YEAH, GO GET THE TOILET PAPER!!"

Lee's eyes burned with the powerful spirit of youth, and ran out of the apartment to achieve his errand.

"Works every time…" Neji said with a giggle.

Twenty minutes later….

" I have returned, my friends, on my great and daring quest of acquiring jello and toilet paper…" Lee said, putting the bags down.

"Now what?" Naruto said, turning to Neji, as did Lee and Kiba. Neji's finger were drawn together, and his expression was one of deep thought. Then he giggled, and turned to the others.

"Why my dear friends…. We go TP some poor souls house now! Any suggestions?"

Naruto thrust his hand in the air like a child, whining, "OOOH! Pick me, pick me, I have one, I have one!!"

Neji pointed. "Yes, Naruto?"

It was Naruto's turn to giggle, and he whispered something, and Kiba, again, reached over to smack him. "SPEAK UP, man!" Akamaru barked in agreement.

Then with a hysterical laugh, Naruto said, "Sasuke's out of town on a mission, we should TP his house!!" Everyone but Lee started giggling like school girls.

"Ummm, won't he kill us for that?" Lee said, acting as a voice of reason.

"WHERE'S YOUR SPIRIT OF YOUTH?!" They all shouted back at him.

And it was decided.

Thirty minutes later….

The four of them stood together in front of a well mummified house, each admiring their masterpiece.

"Let's name it…. Sakura." said Naruto, in a dream like state. Neji and Kiba both smacked him over the head and said, "We're not naming it after your girlfriend!" Naruto turned away and pouted.

"We're naming it?" Lee asked, more confused then ever. Neji rolled his eyes acting like it was a stupid idea, but then giggled and said, "It's name is Rick."

Kiba frowned. "OH," giggle," I get it, from the movie!!"

"But…" Lee started, but then became very aware that their drunken state, stopped. They all looked at him, and Neji whispered, "Did you bring the jello?" Lee sighed and nodded.

"Soo…." Naruto said, looking at Neji with excitement, "Now what?"

Neji giggled, "Jello time."

Kiba grinned more broadly then ever. "Hee hee, we get to eat jello." Neji shook his head, which resulted in Kiba pouting. "NO, we are going to fill some unlucky souls pool with jello!"

"OOOOOH! OOOOOH! Sasuke has a pool in the backyard! Let's fill his! And we can name it Sakura!!" Kiba got over his depression enough to laugh, and agreed," That's a great idea… except for the Sakura part."

Neji nodded as well. "Let's do it." But again, Lee felt it was time for a voice of reason.

"But… won't Sasuke get mad?" He knew at this point his attempt was feeble, because they were already heading to the back yard. Only Naruto paused to look at him and say, "Where's your spirit of youth?"

Thirty-five minutes later….

"It's beautiful…" Neji said with a loving sigh, looking down into the pink pool of jello. Kiba was quietly crying, nodding his head. Naruto smiled.

"It's pink like Sakura…" Neji ignored his statement and turned to Lee.

"Lee, get in the pool, and swim thirty times around the pool. I bet you can't do it in five minutes!"

Lee didn't even hesitate to argue, with eyes burning and shouting something about the spirit of youth, he jumped in the pool of jello, and swam around and around, starting to stir it.

Kiba nodded in approval," Good thinking Neji. I was wondering how we'd get that done."

Naruto, Kiba and Neji all giggled, while watching Lee continuously swim in circles.

Soon, the jello got thicker and thicker, and Lee was starting to have difficulty swimming while on his twenty-seventh lap.

"Nooo, I will not be beaten by pink jello! I have a spirit of youth, I will double my amount, I will go another thirty times around!"

The others applauded at the proclamation and cheered him on, watching him continue the laps, but slow down considerably.

Five minutes later….

"Uhhh, guys, where's Lee? I think he stopped swimming…" Naruto inquired, looking around the edge of the pool for his spandex wearing friend.

Neji didn't answer, he was to busy testing the sturdiness of the pool, by setting the rocks of Sasuke's garden on top of it, and watching it slowly sink to the bottom.

Kiba turned to the sound Naruto's voice, but was busy eating a corner of the jello, and frowned a bit.

"Iff doff noff." Kiba replied and Akamaru barked, while sitting next to him, staring at a dark spot in the pool.

"Off, therff hiff isff." Kiba said, pointing at the spot of green in the pink jello, and then swallowed.

Naruto gasped, though didn't move to remove Lee from the bottom of the pool. Kiba stared at it for a moment, and then continued eating.

Neji looked up at the chatter and then down at the green spot in the jello.

"I suppose we'll have to get him out before he dies, huh?" He said, and then giggled. "How funny… death by jello." They all laughed and attempted to get serious, but the result was more giggles.

"I got an idea." Said Naruto, doing some hand signs and then six other Naruto's stood beside him. "Okay, here's the plan, everybody, form a chain!" And they proceeded to take one another's hands, while the last one jumped in and bounced against the jello, before slowly sinking down to Lee.

With a plop, as Neji, two Naruto's, and Kiba pulled, Lee and the other Naruto's came soaring out of the jello.

The other Naruto's vanished and they pulled Lee onto his back, seeing if he was alive by poking him with sticks.

"Is… it dead?" Neji asked, a look of awe on his face. Naruto shook his head. "Nope. He's just

passed out… what now?"

Nine AM the next morning….

Sasuke trudged through Konoha, utterly exhausted from his long mission, with Sakura, Sai and Kakashi following behind him.

"I call shower first." Sakura said with some authority in her voice, almost daring someone to argue with her.

"Fine." The three replied. Sakura, Sai and Kakashi had been assigned as Sasuke's 'baby sitters" in case he decided to "run away" from Konoha. That meant living with him, much to Naruto's annoyance. He had been very upset that he couldn't stay there too. Sakura noticed that he had been desperate for attention lately, and before she left on the mission, wondered if he was going to do something stupid while she was gone.

As they walked, whispers and gasps were heard at the sight of Sasuke, and many mother's rushed their children hurriedly by, as if he was a bomb about to explode. This seemed to amuse Sai, and Kakashi began to wonder what was going on.

They found out when they got back to the house. The house had been covered in toilet paper, and over the top of the roof the words " I NAME THEE SAKURA" were easy to read. The group stared for a moment before looking the pink haired ninja with a questioning gaze.

"Uhh, right. I had a feeling Naruto was getting lonely." She said, blushing madly. Sasuke on the other hand was not amused. "My house…" they heard him mutter with an almost audible whine. Sai stared, with a fake smile, said, " Is this the feeling of being highly amused?"

Kakashi just shook his head and then asked, "Do you smell… strawberries?"

They all followed the strong scent of strawberries to the back yard where Sasuke froze on spot in shock to see the pool filled to the brim with a pink substance.

"Is that… jello?" Inquired Kakashi, eyes wide. Sakura made a choked noise, as they all saw written in the jello "Naruto, Neji, Kiba, and Lee were here". Sai stared at the mountain of empty jello packets that blocked the way into the back door of the house. Kakashi frowned and prodded the jello.

"Wow, they must've used every packet of jello in Konoha. I could almost walk on this without chakra."

Sakura's shoulders were shaking and she was bent over, her hands over her face. Sasuke and Sai looked at her and inched away, in case she lost it and decided to make them her personal punching bags, only to be startled when she stood up and started laughing hysterically.

Sasuke glared and declared, " I'm going to kill them."

* * *

AUTHOR NOTE: Should we end it there? Should we continue?

AkatsukiMirage~ I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

ShinkanNeko~ Yeah that was great.

OK people this is what happens when you eat too much pumpkin pie on thanksgiving…wow sugar rush

My sis and I had this thought when going to my house from my parents…we just had to write it out…hope you enjoyed. Oh yeah we don't own any of the Characters, but if we did Neji would be Shinkan's and Sasuke would be Mirage's


	2. TieDyed Hakamas

Neji's POV of the morning after Death By Jello. Also, when he wakes up, it's noon.

* * *

The sounds of birds chirping sounded like a thundering rock band that made my head pound and spin. I attempted to open my eyes, but the bright lights that came from the curtain-less windows caused me to close them again, my headache flaring to another level of pain.

I could barely move my body and there seemed to be a heavy weight on my chest. I wondered if that was why I couldn't sit up. I tried to stretch my legs only to feel something furry and warm shift against my feet. Despite the warmth there, I actually felt cold, like I had spent a night without any blankets over me…. Wait, furry? WHAT THE HELL?!

My eyes flew open and I tried to look down at my feet, only to have my vision blocked by blond spikey hair, and the sounds of snoring coming from it. I frowned and shifted, still not awake enough to decide what it was. But when I felt something wet and warm oozing from it, I shoved it off in disgust.

"EW!" I shouted in surprise. The thing I had shoved fell off the bed with a thump and a groan. I stared down at Naruto who stared at me incredulously.

"Wha-? What are you doing in my house?!" he asked me, now frown, then thinking harder, he shouted," Better yet, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BED?!"

I just shook my head, but groaned at the throbbing pain and muttered," Ugh… I don't remember." It was then I looked down towards my feet to see Akamaru laying on his back, feet protruding in the air and tongue lulling from the side of his mouth. There was also a small nest of blankets beside him that grumbled and said, "Will you SHUT UP, I'm sleeping here!" It sounded distinctively like Kiba.

Again, Naruto's," What the hell?! Did we sleep on the same bed together?! EWWWW!!" I groaned and ignored him, leaving the bed to find a cup of water. My mouth was dry and I felt nauseous.

"Oh Buddha…" I muttered and stepping over Naruto, who was frowning in deep thought and confusion, headed for his kitchen. It was then I started to remember some of the reasons why I was there.

First, Kiba and Ino were now dating, and we had gotten together to celebrate. Kiba had brought drinks, Lee had been volunteered not to drink… and then after a couple of drinks myself, I didn't remember a thing except waking up in Naruto's bed, with the stupid blonds head on my chest.

I gave a shudder and grabbed a glass and filled it with water, drinking slowly as my head swayed slightly. Wait, where was Lee then? I wondered, giving a mental count on who was in the bedroom. Perhaps he went home? Well, we were talking about training. Maybe I dared him to run around Konoha a thousand times and didn't remember. Anything to get rid of the spandex wearer. Oh well. Didn't matter.

I stood in the kitchen, finishing my water and looked up to see Naruto wander in, a look of horror on his face.

"She's going to kill me, she's going to kill me… 'I Name Thee Sakura…' Oh gosh, Sasuke's going to kill me too…."

I ignored his muttering, finding it in no way concerning myself and said without really caring if he heard, "I'm going home now, see you." And left, waving my hand at him.

Five minutes later….

I had arrived at the Hyuuga compound and everyone was staring at me. What for? Did I still have Naruto's drool on me? I looked down at my hakama in surprise to see pink stains, as if someone had tie-dyed it while on me. I continued walking, but a bit faster, and realized that THAT was what they were staring at me for. I felt my face turn slightly red, and hurried to the main house. I had to change quickly before Hiashi-sama saw me.

Entering into the house, I went upstairs towards my bedroom and was about to open the door when I heard a gasp from behind me. Slowly turning around, Hinata was staring at me with her hands over her mouth, eyes wide.

"Uhh, good morning, Hinata-sama. Err, excuse me please." I bowed to her and opened my door and was in it, slamming the door quickly, before she could reply. Pausing slightly, I was surprised to hear her laughing in the hall.

* * *

Shinkan~ I couldn't help it! It came to me in the night!

Mirage~ Haha, I never knew Neji's hangover's could be so amusing. :D

REVIEW, REVIEW!!! Please?


	3. Not All Is Clover

Not All Is Clover

Karin's POV

Paying for two genin teams to remove the toilet paper and jello from the Uchiha main house: 130 $. Attempting (and failing) to remove the paint on top of the roof that says, "I NAME THEE SAKURA": 109$. Watching Uchiha Sasuke fume over his pink stained pool: Priceless.

I felt a little bad for finding Sasuke's misery funny, but really, how could anyone NOT find the Uchiha's irritation absolutely **hilarious**? I mean, Sasuke IS important to me. But Naruto really out did himself this time!

Sakura (who was wise enough to give up on Sasuke and is dating Naruto) said that Sasuke has been in a 'bad' mood lately. In other words: glaring at all who accidentally say the words 'pink', 'toilet paper', 'paint', and 'pool'.

But hell hasn't broken loose yet. When Naruto came over (in other words- dragged over by the ear by Sakura) to apologize, Sasuke said Naruto was banned from the Uchiha compound. Of course, this was after he tried to kill Naruto. It took both Kakashi and Sai to hold Sasuke back (which is good, because we were all pretty sure it would take all of us). Nevertheless, Naruto has been in a state of depression (Serves him right!) and Sakura says he said he'd never let Neji drink again (Whatever that means.)

But time was running out. Sasuke could only be irritated for so long. Kakashi sensed it too. He'd been constantly monitoring Sasuke to make sure he hadn't killed Naruto yet…. YET.

Which is why I came up with this idea for revenge. Though… if I would have known it would have backfired so badly, I never would have suggested it. Sasuke's still mad at me… And STUPID Suigetsu won't LET it GO!

It happened two days ago…

8 am, Saturday- Breakfast at the Uchiha Main House Kitchen

Sasuke was in a REALLY bad mood. So bad in fact, Kakashi had requested back up from both Suigetsu and I. I hadn't known how bad it had affected Sasuke, though I had my suspicions. Suigetsu, like usual, took the whole thing as a big joke. Saying all Sasuke's 'favorite' words in rapid succession. Nearly getting him roasted.

"Hey, Sasuke. I noticed that the paint on top of the roof where the toilet paper used to be is the same shade as pink in the pool!"

Everyone stopped eating. Everyone looked at Sasuke. He was the only one still eating. Oh buddha… that idiot.

"Hn." Sasuke put his empty bowl on the table and left the room. Kakashi nodded at me to follow him just in case he had a… 'Temper-tantrum'.

That's when I approached him with my plan.

"Sasuke-kun."

"Karin." He glanced in my direction, but other than that kept his back to me. I mentally sighed. He was REALLY irritated.

"I was thinking… instead of killing Naruto, why don't you just make him as miserable as he made you?" I suggested carefully, keeping my tone as nonchalant as possible.

"I am NOT miserable." He said, turning around and glaring at me. Oops, I awoke his anger on me. Save yourself Karin!

"Well I thinking, ya know, um—" He cut me off.

"And I doubt anything YOU could come up with—" he started, sharingan gleaming.

"Sasuke, you should prank him back!!!" I cut him off this time. He paused, glared and turned his back to me again. It was quiet, and after a minute, I sighed and turned to leave when he said softly,

"What do you have in mind?"

10 am, Sunday- Naruto's Apartment

Naruto had been running off on missions ever since Sasuke's murder attempt failed, keeping as far away from the village as possible. So, he hadn't exactly been easy to find and prank, and so a week had passed since I had spoken to Sasuke about the plan. And… he'd been in a pretty good mood since then. Well… as good of a mood as Sasuke could be. The fact that he hadn't roasted Suigetsu yet was a sign that things were looking up.

So when I finally managed to corner Naruto(aka, force him to open the door for me so I could have a 'civil' conversation with the blonde idiot), he seemed rather, how to say, paranoid that I was there.

"Naruto-kun," I started out friendly, for if I didn't he might fly the coop," I was wondering if you could help me with something. You see, Sasuke's been very stressed out since the… incident, and well, I know of this herb that calms ones nerves if rubbed on the skin. I was thinking if you wanted to make Sasuke, er, less homicidal at the sight of you, and therefore less snappish at EVERYONE, you could go pick some."

I wasn't surprised to see the suspicious glare he gave me.

"Why should I do that? I doubt a plant can cure Sasuke of being-"

"You should do that BECAUSE… this is all your fault. You pranked him, you dyed his pool pink, you wrote that ridiculous nonsense on his house. You did everything. And I don't care how funny Sakura thinks it is."

I smirked. Naruto looked downcast. Ha, I've got him in the bag.

"Fine. What does this plant look like?" He grumbled. I smiled and pulled out a small picture and handed it to him with a basket.

"Thanks Naruto-kun!" At that, I went to the door, and called over my shoulder," try to look for near the river."

Naruto's Pov- 12 pm, Sunday- Near the Konoha River

I sat down on a boulder glaring up at the trees around me. I had been looking for and hour and a half, and NOTHING. This herb sure was hard to find. The more I thought about it, the more I felt stressed. Geez, I sure could use this plant myself. And how easy it is to use- you just rub it on. BUT, I still hadn't found it.

And Karin said it would be around the river. Well, I had looked around the river… maybe she meant it grew around trees.

I got up and started to head towards the thick tree line, when I noticed something from the corner of my eye. THERE IT WAS! It was a bush, not a tiny plant like it showed in the picture. And I looked around and felt stupid. I had sat in it once already.

Good thing I didn't ask for Sakura's help, she would've made me feel worse.

I sighed, feeling a little better that I had finally found, and I started to pick it. Strange, it felt slightly oily on my skin. I wondered what properties it had that made it calm someone. I'll ask Sakura later. What was this plant called anyway?

It had three strange leaves grouped together… maybe it was in the clover family! Yeah, probably.

I took off my jacket and sat down on it next to the bush, and started putting the leaves in the basket. On occasion, whenever I thought about Sasuke and felt a little worried, I rubbed it against my arms and waited to see if it worked.

I sat there for half an hour, and noticed my skin was turning blotchy red. And kind of itchy… huh. As fast as it was appearing, it was disappearing. I was surprised to feel Kyuubi's chakra coursing through me. What did he want?

But hey! I was feeling a lot better! This would DEFINITELY help Sasuke too.

**Idiot… **I heard Kyuubi growl in the back of my mind. I was about to ask him what he meant when I felt him go to sleep. Stupid fox…I decided to disregard him for the moment.

I stood up with a full basket, grinning form ear to ear. Time to head to the Uchiha Compound!

Karin's POV- 2 pm, Sunday- Uchiha Main House

I was starting to pace. Was Naruto such an idiot that he couldn't find a stupid plant when it was EVERYWHERE near the river. Sasuke was getting edgy too. Kakashi had taken him to the gardens after ATTEMPTING to use a fire jutsu on Sai and Suigetsu. Those two really shouldn't be left alone with Sasuke. They really grated on his nerves.

I sighed again. Dammit Naruto, when was the news that he had headed for the hospital come? Juugo had been waiting at the Hospital entrance for two hours.

I was startled by the sound of the gate being open to the back yard. I stood up to ask Juugo the news when there was Naruto, running towards me, with that stupid grin on his face. I felt Sasuke's presence behind me… and I felt his chakra flare with his rage.

And then… Naruto tripped. And the basket flew from his hands and flipped in the air, and showered Sasuke and I poison oak leaves. I was too shocked to speak. Apparently Sasuke was too. He hadn't moved an inch. Naruto got up from the ground and frowned a little.

"Great, now I had to pick in up again. Aw-man, and it fell in the pool too. Hey, it's still pink. And I noticed the words are still on the roof. Too bad I can't remember what paint I used. I was kind of drunk when it happened." He looked thoughtful, but then seemed to freeze up, and I felt Sasuke's chakra flare again. I slowly turned to look at him, my body bracing for the tantrum that had been building up for the last two weeks since the incident.

To my utmost surprise, despite Sasuke's obvious temper, he was completely stock-still. And swelling rapidly.

"Karin… I'm allergic to poison oak. This wasn't part of your plan. At all."

I gasped and called for Kakashi, who seemed extremely surprised to see Naruto there-alive- and to see Sasuke in a state of… well, was that really Sasuke? His face was like a balloon.

* * *

AkatsukiMirage- Soooo... there you have it! Sasuke's revenge... gone seriously wrong.

Shinkan- Yes, poison oak. Wonderful revenge. That was the most miserable summer of my life when I accidentally brushed against. Ugh. *shiver*

AkatsukiMirage- Oh, and just because poison oak is technically from the U.S., this is from AU. So no one give us a hard time.  
HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT! We might write another chapter to explain why everyone thinks the 'incident' is Naruto's fault, and has no connections to Kiba, Lee, and Neji. R&R. ^^

NOTE-

___The poison oak of the southeastern United States, Rhus quercifolia, has its leaves divided into three leaflets; the leaflets are densely haired and generally have three to seven distinct lobes. The white, berry-like fruits are also somewhat hairy. The poison oak of the U.S. Pacific coast, R. diversiloba, is a shrubby or sometimes climbing plant that grows to 2.4 m (8 ft) high; its three-leaflet leaves are toothed or lobed and are hairless. Both species contain poisonous substances that are believed to be identical or closely related to that found in poison ivy._


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